AUTHENTIC LIVING THROUGH HARMONIOUS ABUNDANCE
By CC Treadway
I have been exploring the concept of harmonious abundance for some time. Harmonious abundance would include: being successful and driven without destroying the planet, loving what I do and being financially supported by it, not working myself to the bone and having a happy and balanced family and social life to boot.
So, I went from working my to the top in the commercial arts, to opening my heart, to burning out, to stepping out of the matrix without a parachute, to landing flat on my face in poverty while I dedicated myself to my “dream”, to recovering and being in a state of constant abundance during a 6 year period I like to call, “Hell.” Can ya feel me? I mean its such a cliché I’m embarrassed to share it, but I have noticed so many people going through this process who are just as clueless as I was, so I offer this article as some possible insight.
We all have our own versions of hell, but this process for me was unexpected, out of my control and totally agonizing. It was a time of constantly questioning who I was, not feeling like I fit into to any group, culture, subculture or counterculture. And yet it was also a time of constant new horizons (which hasn’t changed), exploring the different landscapes of life and my psyche.
Many of us are questioning our values, wanting our vision of success to work in harmony with environment, but totally confused in how to make the transition. Feeling like our dreams and goals are supported in a society that is in the midst of this same transition is overwhelming. I mean; we have no idea what is going on on a good day.
These concepts aren’t brand new, but put in context for the spiritually oriented person just trying to make a difference in the world, it forms a nice roadmap.
Have you asked yourself:
If you have asked yourself these questions, congratulations, you are in transition! If you have been asking these questions for years with no real change, then you are stuck in transition, unable to move forward. Congratulations! It’s time to move forward.
My interest has become: what if you could have it all? What if you could live in harmony with nature, participate in the system and do what you love in the world? What if your dreams and visions seamlessly wove together your gifts, prosperity and abundance for all?
First, let us go into the different forms of manifesting, because this is very important to understand. As you are reading, you may recognize yourself in one or all categories. Please celebrate the gift of who you are.
LEFT BRAIN MANIFESTING
Most highly successful people understand this. They study the cycles of their particular business, assess their personalities and their life goals, and proceed accordingly. Their instincts work in conjunction with their life goals. Since they know how to shut off their feelings when it comes to work, they handle failures and rejections well, and continue forward. They are able to make plans, set long term goals, stick with them and actualize them. Contrary to popular ascension belief, this type of manifesting isn’t going anywhere. It is very useful and will continue to work well for those naturally wired in this way.
When I hang with the Wall Street crowd, they have a life plan that began at birth, and it doesn’t stop at their funeral. They have also meticulously planned how their wealth will be distributed for the future generations. This does not make them greedy or superior, this makes them masters of linear time. A mature left brainer is reliable, accountable and puts integrity as a priority in their life. Long-term planners and achievers have power and are comfortable with how they are. It is just the way it is. Better to understand that than to get angry about it.
True left brainers also tend to admire creativity, supporting the arts and filling their homes with expensive, wealth accumulating paintings.
The temptation when using a linear format to manifest is going into “push” or “will,” which is attempting to override the forces of nature with our personal desires. This is how most people operate when they are not in their authentic selves. They are out of harmony with nature, destroying the Earth and trying to control everything and everyone.
Because of the ability to shut off the feeling part of the brain to get tasks done they can lose their compassion in the face of challenge. Unfortunately this happens a lot, and oftentimes the people who make it to the top are the ones that care the least. But it’s so important to remember that not all linear types are evil! Some are very connected to their hearts.
I have met Wall Street and real estate moguls who are totally in their authentic selves and in their integrity. They work with the forces and the cycles, they know who they are and know their limits, and they have incredible access to energy. I have also met a few who do not practice these principles. They are out of harmony with nature, creating destruction and they end up sick and on my healing table- usually for just one or two sessions though, because lets face it, energy healing is a reach for the linear mind!
So, that goes for all of us. If we go into push and refuse to pay attention to the forces of nature, whether rich or poor, in “the system” or “out,” we get sick. I have certainly had my experience of this.
The Left Brain in My Life
My schooling in the left brain way of life was great. I grew up with a father who is a master at it. I worked in the commercial arts as a video editor and I accomplished every career goal I had set out to by age 34, bought an apartment in NYC, put myself through healing school and traveled the world. Financially supporting myself with my left brain while working with my right brain was a breeze. But when I started opening my heart in my healing work, I found myself wanting to be more artistic and less linear. I wanted more experience with my feminine side. It seemed like the shangrila of life. I wanted a garden, a strong man, an art and music studio to create away in, long sunsets on the porch and less structure. Simple right?
RIGHT BRAIN MANIFESTING
True right brained types live life in the moment. When I talk to most artists or spiritual people, their plans stop before they start, or they don’t use that word at all. Try making dinner plans with them, most likely you will just have to catch them in the right moment, or you will be eating alone. Accumulating masses of wealth over time is probably unlikely unless they have someone helping them who has a stronger long term focus.
However, a right brained person is more likely to have sudden windfalls of money, miracles to bail them out in the moment, or the money just “showing up” when they need it. They also tend to “meet the right person at the right time.” They are the ones that get up in the middle of a meeting because they just “feel they need to walk 3 blocks north.” Of course, a shaman from the Amazon is waiting for them there with the healing formula for their sick friend. This does not make them flaky or better, it makes them masters of the moment.
As they mature, and if they are smart, they will have learned how to work with the natural fluctuations of the creative force. This includes not being depressed when things naturally recede, or putting money away and budgeting wisely for the times when the forces of nature are quiet.
With the rise of the divine feminine energy, the support for right brain manifesting is increasing. This is why some who were forced to manifest the left brain way for so long are now having much more success living and thriving in the moment. Masses of spiritual and artistic types are getting together and celebrating how awesome their way of doing things is. Opportunities to create and share are popping up everywhere. But, I will say again, the linear way of manifesting is not going anywhere, things are just balancing out.
Often, but not always, the frustration with these types of people is that they don’t know how to create stability, they can’t really see ahead and it leaves them confused and in a state of inaction. Depression can set in when a huge surge of energy dies down and they are forced to integrate in a more quiet way.
The other trap is “passivity/laziness” or “entitlement,” which means that you are overriding your personal desires with the expectation of being taken care of by the forces of nature. Working with the universe from the right brain means showing up, being fully present in your authentic self with your gifts, and allowing Creator to meet you and gift you. It means listening closely to what the universe is asking of you and doing your best to meet it and participate with life. It’s always an exchange.
It does not mean smoking weed all day, saying “fuck the man!” while you collect your welfare check. I have met many of these people. They do not end up on my healing table, because they expect me to go to their house and heal them for free, thanking them as I let myself out.
In our culture, the right brained way is looked down upon. Think about it: starving artists, martyr healers, non profits, etc. Human beings, especially in the United States, have associated doing right brained things with poverty, and have made it less important. Highly right brain dominant people will struggle in our society the way it is set up unless they find a great left brainer to take care of them. Oftentimes that person ends up being the system itself.
But the answer isn’t making our society wrong. It’s engaging the journey of the empowered artist, the empowered healer, and seeing how that can integrate and be valued in our culture. Of course, the masculine and feminine must both see the value in the other, meeting in the middle for the new solution.
My Switch to the Right
My schooling in the right brained way of life was brutal. Mostly because I had a lot of images about what it actually meant, personally and what I inherited culturally. But also because I am naturally centered in the middle of the right and left brains, so it was like wearing a dress that didn’t quite fit. Nevertheless, I had this idea that I was supposed to be an unpredictable artist with long, flowy hair that was in constant communication with Mother Nature, spewing out songs on call and not caring about things like the bills.
This is what I see a lot of people doing as well. We devalued and lost our true feminine natures, so finding them is a little dicey at first! For me, the shadow beliefs that played themselves out were a deeply unhealed, unloved feminine. But I did not know this, I would have told you the opposite.
So, I lost everything, fell into extreme passivity and poverty, lost direction and then was severely physically injured for almost two years. Not a lot of songwriting going on in that state! I was totally shocked and my feminine apparently didn’t feel too supported.
I also found that while I was helpless and entirely dependent on others for a bit, that there were a lot of people there with me. They were very, very angry with the system for not making room for them, for not seeing their way of doing things and for trying to make them into someone they weren’t. They then completely rejected everything they associated with the system and lost touch with their own empowerment. If you had any doubt, you can bet that a lot of the world’s poverty problem is simply a rejection of the feminine.
I didn’t want to stay this way, so I dedicated myself to healing and getting truly empowered in my feminine. I had to learn from the ground up what feminine abundance was, because it was not given to me and because a back injury was making it really hard to get up off the ground!
After some years of growing out my hair and living with nature in the middle of nowhere I did finally receive the gifts of this approach. I learned that I was always taken care of, that I was part of nature, and that I could work with the seasons and cycles for abundance. By the end of my “training” I was actually able to perceive the forces of nature before they came to me, and began working with them to create and thrive. I also learned that I needed my masculine side turned on and active for any creative impulses to come through. Structure and support were paramount to get anything done and to feel worthy. The two sides of me began to fall madly in love.
One day I was having a very flustered conversation with my dear friend about whether I should give it all up and join the traveling circus, or whether I should give it all up and work on Wall street, she said to me: “CC, you are not caught in the middle of two opposites, you are at the top of the pyramid. Your spiritual connection overrides duality, and you have both an extraordinary intelligence and an artistic gift. When you accept that, you will see there are others there with you, and you have a specific job to do.”
This was a defining moment and completely changed my perspective of my situation. Not only did I feel pretty great about myself, but also, I felt something had been named, and that was important at that time. From that point I accepted who I was, and now have not just one, but a community of people who are right there with me.
So how do the Center people manifest?
First, I will say that I think more people are coming into center as the masculine and feminine forces come into balance within ourselves. It’s the only way out of this crisis we are in. To me it is the crux of every spiritual tradition, and certainly at the heart of most every spiritual teacher I hear.
Both ways of operating need to be mastered to be able to rest comfortably in the center. From the center point, life can be viewed in the spherical way or in the linear way. They exist at the same time. It’s a delicate balance of connecting with your personal will, and allowing life to meet you. From the center point we know we are God and we know we are taken care of, but we also know that our personal goals and desires can be created.
We do this guilt free, because somehow we know that we were born to do just this. We believe in ourselves, don’t give up and trust the universe enough to know that all is well no matter what happens.
I use both sides of the brain when needed, and I am happy to say they stopped arguing. It’s a happy marriage. So if I need to plan, I plan. But I know within that plan that I must leave space open for spirit to gift me in the moment and I know things can change. The universe may throw a lot of goodies my way, but I have the choice to accept or decline, depending on my long-term goals.
It took me a long time to have the courage to set goals again after my stint in the right brain. With all the ascension talk, I thought it I would never set a goal again. But being grounded in my long-term desires offers as much pleasure as creative impulses.
This is an example of Harmonious Abundance in my life. I create seasonal business plans while actively meditating and using ceremony to receive. I ask Mother Nature and Creator before starting every new project, and make offerings as an exchange for their support, encouragement and advice. Sometimes they ask things of me, I do them. I am in constant communication with them while pursuing my goals and don’t get angry with them when things don’t go my way. I use this way of interacting with the forces of the universe for every desire I am serious about creating/receiving. I align with my Higher Self and heart every day to make sure my goals are in alignment with my true self. There are always unexpected gifts and pitfalls on the path, and that is just life. My job is to accept the process and do my best.
Harmonious abundance doesn’t separate out. It does not say, “I am out of the system and in Nature.” The system is the structure of society, inherently left brained, so that would simply be the right brain rejecting the left. From a harmonious standpoint we constantly look at what is being balanced, what will need to be balanced and how we as individuals fit into that process. Then we can work within that framework, which is actually larger than the temporary financial or government system that is in place in any society. In that way we can ride major life changes, government collapses or system transformations with strategic intelligence.
Harmonious Abundance is inclusive and based in the heart. It does not make the other wrong. Business becomes a divine, creative project not the enemy. Money is an expression of our energy, how much we value ourselves, and used as a tool for creation. If money transforms into something else, we will still need to accept and master the energy it was created from. The arts, music and dance weave our experience of life together and give us an opportunity to express our creative passion, a fundamental aspect to our humanity. All of us are a living, breathing part of the whole and we become incapable of dismissing Mother Nature or other people in our desires.
Harmonious Abundance understands that things are always being born and things are always being completed - to be born again in a new way. One needs only tend to a garden for a few years to understand that.
I hope that this information provides a roadmap for you to step more fully into your authentic self and assists you in living your dream, whatever it may be.
(c) CC Treadway 2011. All rights reserved. You may repost this article in its entirety with a link back to this site. Please let me know if you repost!
DON’T MESS WITH ME, I LOVE YOU
Transforming Victimhood into Empowerment
By CC Treadway
I often get requests from people who want me to extract their demons for them. I reply to them and let them know that I will ask them to commit to a series of sessions to help transform inner beliefs that are perpetuating the attachments/attacks. Nine times out of ten I never hear back from them.
I have colleagues I can refer them to should they just want good old fashioned shamanic relief, but long term results require a dedication and commitment on the part of the client that many are not willing to do. I do not consider myself a sweeper, I help people grow into their power through self responsibility, healing and education.
As I planned my curriculum for a new summer tele-course, Psychic Empowerment, I remembered this very significant story in my life when I stepped out of the victim paradigm into the super strong love paradigm and watched the world around me change.
HEALERS + CEREMONY = DRAMA
During my 4th year at the Barbara Brennan School of Healing I was asked to take on a leadership role for our final class ceremony. These ceremonies were no small thing. It was really the time for people to showcase their deep, unrealized longings to be seen and applauded. So if you had a dream to sing or dance in front of everyone, this was your time to shine. Of course, this made the whole process very delicate, as these unrealized dreams we have usually carry with them equal amounts of trauma.
The committee of the ceremony was going nowhere fast and rumors were buzzing that it was going to be catastrophic, gasp. So a few people asked me to come in, almost like a consultant to clean it up. For many years I worked as a video and television editor, compiling bits and pieces from film shoots and turning them into stories for a living. So, this was no problem for me. I walked into the meeting and within an hour had the entire ceremony organized and arranged.
However, it would be revealed over the coming weeks that no one but those few people who asked me to come in had hired me. Unbeknownst to me, I had walked in uninvited and crapped all over several people. Although many people were relieved and happy, I deeply upset several sensitive people. These people then formed a committee behind my back to get me thrown out. I did know what hit me as people I loved and trusted conspired against me.
One of the women was so triggered and had a slight case of the “insanity” and, in my fourth year of this so called enlightened healing school, she began to bully me. She bullied me through scathing emails that were sent for the whole class to see. I received almost daily emails of what I could only describe as hateful, confusing and completely ridiculous, targeting me as the entity that must be destroyed. I demanded that she stop, but she said absolutely not, that I deserved it.
From my perspective I was just doing what was asked of me, and I really didn’t need any of this. I hadn’t even wanted to get involved with the ceremony, which is why I wasn’t at the meetings to begin with.
But the worst part? Although I received lots of sympathy from my classmates privately, who couldn’t believe she was doing this, no one said anything to her. Several people bowed out of the ceremony process all together. They were all too afraid. It was my freakin’ childhood all over again…AGAIN. I felt totally numb, scared, hurt, confused, powerless, victimized and sick. The most painful part was that no one had my back. It was actually a little weird. I thought to myself, “What kind of healing school is this, where everyone just stands by and watches someone get attacked?” I realized that this was so out of the ordinary that people just didn’t know how to handle it. Nevertheless, I made a promise to myself at that moment that should I observe that happening to someone in my community, I would help.
At this point, I had a choice, to sink further into playing the victim, to get very aggressive, or to take a stand and find the place within me where I accepted this as my reality and transform it.
I took responsibility for my hidden belief system that was obviously very strong, and went to work to find it. Through some breathing and centering I could find the place inside my heart that accepted this energy from my bully. What I could see was that by accepting it, an energy circuit was activated with her, thus perpetuating the dynamic. When I went deeper into this pain in my heart, the pain said I was bad for being in my power and it just wanted to be liked at any cost, therefore I should sink into the background.
My unrealized longing was to be in my power and lead and it probably came out all sideways, hurting people with the same unrealized longing. I decided that I did not agree with my bully or my pain, and that I was going to stop the circuit. I was not bad. There was a series of misunderstandings and I was naïve, maybe a little overbearing, but not bad.
I took some deep breaths, and allowed the shadow belief to be exposed to the light. I didn’t need to overprocess, I just needed to bring my conscious awareness to the pain and let my love and belief for myself shift the vibration. It was then that I stopped participating in the dynamic.
THE LAST CRAZY EMAIL
When I replied to her last crazy email, I was so unaffected that I made a joke. I saw what she really wanted, because it was the same thing that I wanted. She wrote back laughing at herself and never bullied me again. Just like that. Then we were friends. Of course, I knew she was crazy so we were never good friends! But the air was clear and we were both happy about it.
I then could have compassion for everyone I hurt through my unconsciousness. I walked a little softer into meetings, made more space for those who were scared and let the process naturally unfold instead of ferociously leading like I was editing for live television in New York City. I ended up having a great leadership position as Creative Director of the ceremony as well as participating in many numbers. The ceremony was, by all means, a success. I even got a few apologies.
THE HEALING CONTINUES
A few years later my beloved crazy friend died in a car accident. The ripple of her death was felt through our whole class, the matrix of our tribe forever changed. Her spirit, happy and free, came and visited me during a healing session. Shining brilliant and colorful light, she apologized to me, and we were two souls who were complete.
I felt so grateful that I had handled the situation the way I did. It could have gone in a lot of different directions, but instead, my love for myself and responsibility for my shadow transformed so much ugliness into so much healing.
I use this lesson in my traverses through the astral. Every being is longing to be seen, put to use, be accepted and loved. When I approach an entity in this way, healing beyond what we can imagine happens for both client and entity. My longing with my clients, is to help them find that place within themselves, to find the way to their power, love and acceptance. I educate them about what they are dealing with and teach them not only methods of protection and extraction, but the deep rewarding experience of healing based in love.
When I am able to hold a powerful space of unconditional love, the beings have nowhere to attach to, because any negative beliefs that might attract a negative being, are being bathed in love. In those moments, the love is stronger than any shadow belief. And this is the best argument for truly doing your transformational work. The more beliefs and trauma you bring to the light, the more you are able to be confident in the love you naturally are. I think there may always be shadow energy, but it’s about the balance within you, how brave you are to face your shadow, and how much confidence you have in love in the face of conflict and pain.
It is the love within all of us that makes us strong.
This more than anything, prevents further attack, and sets the client off on a profoundly transformational journey. This gives them the belief to transform their difficult surroundings, and this leads them, quite naturally from rocky shores to safe harbors.
(c) CC Treadway 2011. All rights reserved. You may repost article in its entirety, no changes, with a link back to the site. Please let me know if you repost! Thank you.
THE SHIFT FROM I TO WE: Good News in Cathartic Times
By CC Treadway
Something amazing is happening. The second wave Indigos are taking over. They are not angry, they are not screaming, they are not rebelling. No, no, they are loving the crap out of you. These young ones are coming of age around the world. My friends, the legends are all true, they will heal our planet with their love.
The average age of these innovators? 26. At 36, I feel like the old timer, but I also feel proud because the tracks we laid are being well used and maintained.
I returned to New York on January 1, 2011. I returned to a different city, maybe a different world. See, out in the boonies of rural Arizona, with no TV and everyone disconnected from the mainstream, it was hard to gauge where the pulse of the world was. But in a major metropolitan city, we are shown every day what other cultures are doing, current events are constantly discussed and we are part of the great antenna that broadcasts to the world.
One could say that I have changed, which would be true, but everyone else has too. Life has become a constant collaboration, partly out of need because the economic climate is so different, but also because it seems so pointless now to do everything yourself.
I see that people have changed not only in the spiritual community but in the community at large, which is great because lets face it, the spiritual community is a minority. We are the unsung heroes, meditating and lightworking our butts off in the background.
The biggest tip off that things have changed? My Wall Street-Monsanto-loving-Dad asked me for natural remedies then actually used them. He was rubbing essential oil of Cajeput on his chest and spraying Bee Pollen in his mouth as if he had just discovered a pot of gold. It’s totally weird and totally awesome.
THIS IS WHAT I AM SEEING:
Trees planted everywhere, community gardens, and farmer’s markets galore.
The Empire State Building is using renewable energy. Representatives of the wealth building landmark said in a press conference, “We are not doing this as some kind of charity project for the right thing, we are doing it because it was the best financial decision for the service.” Ya gotta love the suits. But ya also gotta love the tree huggers who developed a superior product at a bargain. Can you see how powerful that is? By not separating out of the game, but engaging fiercely, the centerpiece of the capitalistic world is using renewable energy, and no one had to die for the change.
These flower power heart centered hippies are not afraid to set goals and go after them. I’ve never met spiritual people more grounded and focused on building a solid intention, container and plan for their vision….together. They develop their crafts like any other master, do their emotional work and aren’t afraid to keep it real. They pour their hearts into their projects and care more than everyone else.
As a Gen-Xer, I had to search through the “whatevers” and the “it’s all goods” to find the courage to show how much I cared. But these cats? They are in-your-face with all the caring. They go to the jungle, sit with the medicine and welcome the transformation. And I am gonna stop saying they, because We are in the same tribe. I’ve been waiting a long time for the world to catch up with my heart. I don’t say that in arrogance, because I know I’m not alone, but this is what all of the work has been for; so we could come together to be this great shift that is Now.
The creative energy cannot be contained here. Art, music, writing, business, dance…all of it, together! Community work spaces have developed. These places are more like work and creative clubs, where people pay a membership fee and get access to art classes, office space and coffee.
There are gatherings after gatherings of people coming together to make stuff! Painting together, eating together, meditating together, singing together, visioning and loving the earth together.
For me, what is so interesting about a city, is the breakdancing backdrop of this movement: the buildings, the projects, the noises, the suits, the trains, the arts, the history, the stress, the pressure - the contrast. I love the contrast. And I love how We rest in the middle of that contrast, holding it all, judging none of it, being all of it.
There is no choosing a side, there is no “the government is doing this to us.” It’s an empowered stance of inclusion that says, “We are the system, and this is how We do it.”
In the land of We, there is no them, because we are all reflections, expressions of the One Spirit. We are two sides of the same coin. Do we really believe this? We do.
THE DIVINE FEMININE
I am seeing The Triple Goddess on fire. I am seeing women unafraid of their power, not holding back so that the insecure man can shine at their expense. Oh no, these women are talented, multifaceted, smart, confident, loving and opening to creating with other women and other men. Busting out. Not just in a Divine Feminine gathering, but out in the world.
Women are coming into the world with their ideas and innovation, and claiming their right to family and relationship. There is no one without the other. The Divine Feminine and Masculine are not separate experiences, they’re an integrated experience with nothing to prove. The tracks have been laid and we are all cruising.
Women are no longer hiding in the shadows, storehouses of Earth’s magic kept under wraps, nor are we fighting for our freedom. We have it. (I understand that I am in the United States where this is possible, but now that it is here, I know it will be possible in places where women do not yet have their freedom.)
We are coming together and singing each other’s praises, loving loudly, and the men are right next to us. The young ones did not grow up with too much sexism, and their vibration is strong. So strong it shifts people just by walking into a room. Does this sound like utopia? It kinda feels like it. Don’t wake me up.
THE DIVINE MASCULINE
The other day, my dear friend here in New York had a meltdown on the street. We were leaving a gathering and a lot of energy had moved through the event. I was holding her while she cried on the street, and when I looked up, what was surrounding us? Two young Indigo men holding space for her, deeply in their hearts. They were sending my friend healing energy in her moment, completely grounded, real and present. They didn’t stop until she was done. Holy shit!
I am seeing The Divine Masculine waking up. It is spectacular. And not just because of their apology videos (which I appreciate), but because they are standing in their power and creating a better world with us. They are laying the bricks of change proactively and not just bitchin’ about the corrupt system, or rebelling with inaction. No, they are conquering new landscapes of love by becoming greater masters of energy, talent and intelligence with the women right next to them.
I see them beginning to watch their sexual energy and let it flow wisely into the world, and into the woman. They are beginning to lead with their hearts, and when they look into the eyes of the Feminine, they are actually seeing and respecting her. And I am fanning my face now, breathe, because I have to say, I support these men, I appreciate these men, these men ignite me like lightening in the void.
The heart is not feminine, every human has one. Love is our birthright and we all can share in this blissful state of living in the heart.
I see relationships in flux in the conscious community. Partners are boldly working through eons of codependent dynamics, walking into the cauldron together and hoping for the best sometimes. We haven’t fully crossed the threshold into the new place with it, and I think it is the hardest work of our times. I’m getting a little break right now, but am in deep gratitude for those couples who are transmuting this energy for the planet.
In some ways this is the last frontier for spiritual people: family and home. To create a home environment that is healthy and happy for our children to grow is the most important and sacred job we all have, and yet it is the most difficult. It hits our core, it hits everything vulnerable about us. Spiritual people like to feel invincible, like superheroes. Relationship makes us oh so human, again and again. The brave ones are not backing down, they are committing deeper, letting their love burn through the fire of their resistance, finding their power in the sacred container of relationship.
I still see men resisting standing in the fire of love, perpetually finding themselves and claiming to save the world while they can’t stand by a woman, but I also see that changing. I still see women blaming men for all the wrongs in their lives and in the world, and I also see that changing.
So, let me cheer you on conscious couples and families who are braving the storm. Your love is the backbone of the New World. I see a profound shift in our future as the results of this deep, transformative work lead us to something we cant quite see yet.
And I will also cheer on the single people who are learning to love themselves and be themselves more fully, and hope to inspire you to brave the storm of relationship when it comes your way.
I hope, in the midst of the uncertainty, pain and confusion in the world at this time, that this has helped you. We are moving from I to We, recognizing the beautiful souls around us who are like minded and hearted. Whatever city or town you live in, there are young ones coming of age, ready to love you.
HEALING THE ABANDONMENT ABYSS, PART 1
By CC Treadway
For those of us who have experienced this most intense of all wounds, we know how serious it is. I have found in my healing practice that when it comes down to it, everyone is dealing with abandonment, whether it comes in the form of the fear of rejection, the habitual pattern of love avoidance or good old fashioned codependency and love addiction. From my observations, even those that claim to not experience it really do, it’s just more shrouded.
What is so heartbreaking to see is the judgment and shame that people place on it, not knowing that their reactions are normal. It hurts to be left, but we usually internalize the rejection, making ourselves wrong and unlovable. The good news is that this universal wound is actually something manageable and healable.
One of my biggest teachers has been the abandonment wound.
Coming clean with myself about it and lifting the judgment around it has been one of the most powerful healing responses for both my clients and myself. I continue to grow and learn from it. The fact is codependency is the model we are given for relationship, so its not just the super wounded who need to look at it. However, people who have had early childhood abandonment or abuse will have a more difficult time coping with it as an adult, and yet their system will be patterned for it, so they may find they are reliving brutal rejection and mistreatment time after time, with no tools and no hope to recover or change.
Some events that can trigger this old and unhealed wound are a breakup, a death, being fired, a friendship suddenly ending or an intimate partner or friend who is emotionally unavailable. As a healer and a human, I wanted to dive as deeply into the healing of this wound as I could.
Coming Clean with Myself
Years ago, after a debilitating breakup that left me completely bereft, I devoted myself to healing it. I was sick of feeling awful and powerless, sick of feeling ashamed of my real needs, exhausted from covering up the pain for so long. Of course it wasn't just this breakup, it was ancient, it had always been with me. So I spent five full months tracking when feelings of abandonment would surface. Sometimes it was triggered by an event as simple as saying goodbye to a friend after a movie, other times it would just come over me with no warning. Mostly it was triggered by the loss of that relationship and what that said about my ability to trust myself, and as it turned out, God.
When you get hit by that wound, the mildest reaction is just feeling a bit of sad, lonely discomfort. The most intense reaction is that you feel as though you are completely lost and alone and you must be fed by an external source to survive, addictive feelings begin to control you. It feels like there is nothing supporting you, and nothing to fall back on. It feels like every person in your life doesn’t love you enough or the right way. You begin to try and control your environment and monitor other’s behaviors. It is unhealed child consciousness at its strongest. You must find a primary care giver or you will die. That is the intensity of the emotion.
Sick of trying to cover it up, I finally had to surrender to the experience. I wanted to know just how much it was controlling me. I knew that I would be healing it on a deeper level rather than just applying coping mechanisms, or talking myself out of it.
After this heartbreak, I felt an emptiness and hopelessness inside that was unending and inconsolable, but I had felt this before. Taking responsibility for and confronting the abandonment wound is saying that you are willing to face your deepest fear, your deepest pain. While many things happened in my life to assist in healing this pain, it was my unyielding commitment to the process that brought that about.
The Abandonment Abyss
In those moments where the pain would hit me, I would just sit with myself as the adult, caring witness. I found myself in a deep, black abyss of nothing. It was petrifying at first. And then my child consciousness would appear, crying her eyes out. At the same time that my child consciousness suffered, blamed and cried, my adult consciousness would witness with infinite love, patience and understanding. I had to be strong. I did this again and again and again, sometimes every few minutes in a day.
One time I had to do it for almost three days straight. It was not easy at all, in fact one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I did not let my child take over by affecting my adult behavior. I did not let her “go to the empty well for a drink” as my healer would say. The empty well would be something like trying to get attention from my ex-boyfriend, even if it was ultimately unsatisfying and hurtful. It would have been reaching for ice cream, or talking on the phone non-stop, or not taking responsibility and blaming him. For others it might be drugs, cigarettes or meaningless sex.
Without those vices, I found myself getting to the ultimate wounds- first, abandonment by parents and all the psychology around that, and then inevitably, abandonment by God. That pain was the core, it was unbearable, it was gut wrenching. I felt I had been rejected and betrayed by God, that I didn’t matter at all, the pain was excruciating. I had no choice but to sit with those feelings, to really feel them, to let them out, to hear them.
I sat with this pain a lot. I wanted to be completely unafraid of it. And after some time it was enough. A huge relief washed over me. It was like the weight of the world lifted out of me, making room for the warm, comforting presence of the Divine. It happened automatically, with no preconceived idea that it would. I was overjoyed and felt so cared for. I could feel God within me, filling me, healing me. That was what I really wanted.
The abandonment abyss is what most people are doing anything to avoid, but the truth is, if you face it, it passes. And once you get through it, it gets easier and easier.
Abandonment as Your Ally
Now, the interesting thing is that abandonment has become my ally. Whenever it gets triggered, and it still gets triggered, an instant self love reaction takes place. I had no idea this would happen. Each time I am able to touch deeper parts of the beloved within. The best part is that it’s no one else’s responsibility, so I’ve got the power. Trusting that we are loved and cared for in the midst of chaos takes this practice to a whole new level. It’s challenging, but it’s the only way I know to feel safe.
Abandonment Is a Creative Tool
The other great thing about abandonment is creativity. The best tool we can have right now is our creativity. We will need it to navigate the new world. As our dependency on a corrupt system is crumbling, we need to create the new. Songs, writing, drawing, new business based on love…. all can fill up that seemingly empty void and there is enough for all. This channeling from my guide team describes how abandonment and creativity are linked.
You hold a lot of power as you honor yourself, as you love all parts of yourself. For so long you have tried to eradicate abandonment and now what you are doing is just simply letting go of the idea that it is wrong, it is a gift of story for you as a human, it is a great teacher and there is infinite space and colors in the wound of abandonment. Can you feel the limitless possibilities of creation in the space of abandonment? Can you feel that within yourself - how profound a feeling it is to sit in that space of longing, of emptiness, of pain that seems to stretch as wide as you could possibly fee? Well it is no accident, it is Creators choice, your choice to experience this pain and create within it. There are so many possibilities in life but this vacancy is the abyss. This vacancy is the abyss.
And so as you bring forth your creations in this void of voids, you heal, you make more room for yourself, for your expansion, for your colors, for your music, and as you bring in the creativity, divine love pours from your soul, reminding you of who you are, reminding you that this is all temporary and it is a gift. For creativity is divine. It is direct food, the elixir of your being. Feel the gratitude for such a unique expression of who you are, for such a deep experience of your fullness, your completeness in the vacancy. Do not fear this place, but use it now. Use it to heal. For you understand now, that it is not just there to torture you but to serve you into your highest potential. The abandonment wound opens up limitless space for your creations, for you.
You can bring in the love, let it shower the pain, let it heal the pain, but only when you accept that this emptiness, this loneliness is there as a gift to serve you as a human can you experience the joy of being abandoned, only to discover you are more than you were before. I know what you are thinking, “How could that be joyful?” but we tell you, humanity is just simply irreplaceable, impossible to replicate, it’s perfect. Thank yourself for choosing this crazy pain, this crazy bliss and create within it.
So the next time you feel someone has left you, the next time you feel you need someone else to fill that empty hole, make it bigger, make that pain as big and wide as you can and start to create. Fill it up, paint the canvas, pick up the guitar, cook a meal, or simply feel every particle of your being expand. This is experiential, you must try it. There is purpose in every experience here. Don’t waste it. Let it fill you, let it be you, choose it again and again, every day. Choose your creative longing to expand within. Choose your humanity. Be proud of who you are, even in your darkest moments you are so brave to live this challenge. We sit in awe of your strength, of your efforts, of your potential.
Coming Back into Community
That channeling was so reassuring to me. Through the healing of this wound, and the commitment to tend to it, create from it and love myself, I was able to receive true friendship, true partnership and true community. Life naturally opened up to the bounty of the Universe and I was never alone again.
(c) 2007- 2011 CC Treadway. A
NEW YORK: AMBITION ORGASM
by CC Treadway
Like most New Yorkers, I love New York, even when I hate it. If you have creativity and ambition, big ambition, then you will find it hard to leave. This creativity could be art, healing, entertainment, law, finance, whatever. All that matters is that you are very, very ambitious about it. You have to want to excel at what you do. If you are not ambitious, you will find New York City utterly unacceptable. New York chooses you as much as you choose her. If she chooses you and you leave, she will find a reason to lure you back. She loves her babies, and if you commit to her rules, you will be rewarded nicely.
I have lived a lot of places. I have loved them all, but New York is my home, and I love her most of all. I was born here, raised here, and I feel more alive here than anywhere else on earth. But what is so special about New York that 9 million people decide to cram in and give it a go?
PARK AVENUE POWER
Recently, when I was still living in Sedona, AZ (the polar opposite of New York and everything she stands for), I came to visit and work in NYC. I was overwhelmed by how amazing the healing work was, the commitment of the clients, the willingness to go into the primordial mud and transform. After a particularly rewarding work day, I strolled on down Park Avenue to take it all in. Opening wide to my experience, I felt this overwhelming surge of energy rip through me. I couldn’t help it, I began to cry, weep actually, in the middle of 25th Street and Park Avenue. It was so strong, so familiar and it pierced my soul. Luckily, no one bothers you in NY if you do weird things.
I was standing in the middle of the concrete jungle I tried so hard to get away from for a better life, so why was my soul being lit on fire? This had to be wrong! Cities were disconnected from Nature and I had claimed my natural life in Sedona! Nevertheless, I had to lean up against a building and be with this stabbing longing.
A few months later, back in Sedona, my fiancée and I broke up. While mutual, I was devastated, shocked and disoriented. I packed up my life in Sedona and drove to California to stay at a friend’s. I needed to make some quick money and did not feel like doing healing work. After one email to an old boss, I was on a plane to begin work in New York City at a post-production company. Upon arriving, I was welcomed back on every level by my community, my old professional life, a sweet, affordable place to live with one of my best friends, and more hugs than I knew what to do with. Things that should have taken months to work out happened in a blink of an eye. Lady Liberty was making it very easy for me to be home.
On my way to a meditation one day, I found myself on Park Avenue in that same spot. The rush started to take me over again. I looked north to the Met Life building, which stands on top of the historic Grand Central Station at 42nd Street. It felt like an energy river was running through me. I had to know what was happening. So I turned on my third eye vision. What I saw was amazing. Streaming down Park Avenue was a current of ideas, creativity, drive, excitement, music, concepts and everything else you could think of. I was having an ambition orgasm. I could feel the current traveling through all the train lines that feed into Grand Central Station, carrying with them the hopes and dreams that light this city up, and then spread out into the world.
As I turned my focus upwards I saw huge beings, the guardians of New York City. Oh my GOD, they were amazing. They were huge, powerful, sky scraping giants that monitor and protect this current. They acknowledged me with a nod as I stood there with my mouth open. Their energy was of pure power, integrity and vision. They were not all about the love-dovey, but they weren’t cold. Just taking what they did very seriously, like a lot of New Yorkers.
I stood there absorbing it for a long time. Deep appreciation for their work welled up inside me. After living in an ambition deprivation tank for two years, I was floored at how Mother Earth and these beings were working together to support us, and to control this wild, powerhouse of an energy stream. The energy is all Mother Earth’s, we just naively step into it and give it our best shot. The guardians were called in to help us so we don’t all go insane, thankfully. It’s a good system, although many still are crazy.
Standing on that road, I feel like I am connected to humanity around the world. I feel like my ideas are received, and then transmitted, I feel important. Living out in the boonies I felt invisible, and tried to convince myself that I didn’t need recognition. But here, on Park and 25th, I know I am a part of the great civilization we have created today: for better or for worse. I know that I need to be here to gracefully bring my gifts to the world. Make no mistake, what we have created on this planet, no matter how separate from Nature we have gotten, is a gift from God. We are all perfect creations, made from Love.
I could feel the neutrality in this current and it helped me see I was done with the separatist attitude of making civilization wrong and making everything close to nature right. That was exhausting, and it was the governing energy for me in Sedona. I wanted both. I wanted civilization, art, music, words, ideas, finance, growth and I want a garden and eco-friendly everything. YES. I want to barter and make tons of money. YES. I want to sit and listen to the trees for hours, and then work till I drop. YES. In this current of energy, YES was everywhere, booming through my desires.
This was before the meditation on the New Moon solar eclipse on January 4th, 2011. Needless to say the meditation was off the charts. Later, I had a conversation with a beautiful indigo starchild, Filip Klein, and I was sharing with him my experiences on Park Avenue. He let me finish and then said, “So, get ready, the shaman I study with told me that the major ley line that runs through New York comes from upstate, then flows down into Grand Central, down Park Avenue to Wall Street, one of the largest energy vortexes in the world. That vortex is like a huge antenna that broadcasts to the world.” How’s that for confirmation?
I HEART NY
I don’t like to think of myself as having a boss, or as anyone else being in charge of me, but I knew why Lady Liberty beckoned me back. I was ready for bigger things and she wanted to help me, and loves it when I help her. It’s not because I am a chosen one and I need to be here to save her, we are ALL gifts. It’s because I am so fired up by what I do that I need the help of the greatest guardians, and some of the most powerful energy of the world, and she supports that. I couldn’t do it by myself.
I am a New York baby, I am committed to this place, and I care about her deeply. And now that I have lived in Nature for two years, deeply in love with both a partner and the desert, my relationship to the bedrock here has evolved, softened, and matured. While I may be traveling, dare I say, even moving again, she is here for me now, exactly when I needed her most, as she has always been. And so I honor her, bow to her, serve her and thank her for this support.
POWER: WHY WE WANT IT, WHY WE RUN FROM IT
By CC Treadway
MANY OF US DESIRE POWER, BUT MOST OF US RUN FROM IT, WHY?
While in my healing training, and later in my practice, I heard student after student express that they wanted to be in their power, but were afraid that if they really got into it they would be killed, or they would do something horrible. I doubt there is a person out there that doesn’t, at some point, shake in their boots at the thought of their own success.
Power brings up images of total happiness, or total misery, of disagreeing with the authority or achieving a powerful position in our system, of being selfless in our actions, or of being greedy and controlling, of developing a huge heart, or of being heartless. It is duality at its finest, multiplied to the infinite power.
Childhood wounds play a big part in our fears, or our delusions of grandeur. We often keep ourselves small in a family to hold the tribe together. So, if being in your vibrant essence diminished your sister or mother and they somehow punished you for it, you might have decided that being invisible was a better option, but then fantasize about the day when you can be fully you again. The beliefs that create these roles can tap into the larger cultural belief and voila you have an automatic shut off valve when it comes to being seen in your fullness, and a powerful fantasy life about where you really should be.
I of course have experienced all these fears myself. I cant get angry about this because I think learning how to find and manage your power is one of the keys to successfully navigating the human landscape. I volunteered to come here, so I am willingly dealing with the landscape. Getting knocked down a few times is par for the course. The good news is, you can get back up if you really want to.
I wouldn’t be writing this article if this issue were not close to my heart. I have longed to be big my whole life, and had moments of grand applause, achievements and record setting. I have also been ridiculed, judged, teased, punished and put down for that power. Jealousy is normal, but my sensitive heart couldn’t stand it. Any time I upset someone when I was strong, or won the blue ribbon, I felt so guilty. I would try to bring myself down the status quo to be liked, which of course didn’t work. Then I hated myself and was bored with the company I kept. Over the years I stopped doing this, but it has been a journey of trial and error.
BUT WHY ARE WE SO AFRAID? LET ME TELL YOU A STORY.
Years ago, at the beginning of my private healing practice, I took it slow as far as the amount of clients I took on, but one day, I decided I wanted a full time practice. I told my guides, and they told me I should wait, but I didn’t listen. I put it out there to the universe, took a business course and within a few weeks I had brought my practice up to full time. I thought to myself, “Ha ha! I have outsmarted my guides!” Which, as we all know, is a ridiculous statement on the way to your personal train wreck.
But, how could I be wrong? I was so happy, loving what I was doing, making a difference in people’s lives. The joy! The calls just kept coming and I felt like I had arrived. And then one day, during a very busy day, a client was late and did not call. Without warning, I snapped. I was horrified that he could disrespect me like that, I was even more horrified that I was so horrified. When he finally did call, I was so out of sorts I didn’t answer.
Shaking and confused at my reaction, I had to ask, “What just happened?” But the reaction didn’t get any better, only worse. Over the coming weeks I was in a state of total meltdown. I was not used to the power and responsibility that came with so many new clients. My energy field was collapsing from overload. Every waking moment was spent thinking about my work, and even during my sleep I was still doing healing work on my clients. I felt completely taken over and out of control with no room for myself.
With my energy field now in a state of collapse I had nothing protecting me. My shadow aspects were being hit with unforgiving force and the only protection I had was raw, primal rage. My practice came to a screeching halt as I realized I was in over my head. The rage was nameless, and stayed with me in full force for almost 4 weeks until I finally surrendered in tears in the loving arms of my healer. I was so humbled by the strength of my defense, I didn’t even recognize myself and I certainly felt like a loser of a healer. Worse, I really didn’t know what was going on with me, why any of this was happening. There was a major mystery within my psyche I had to get to, but I felt very far from achieving that.
THE CURRENT OF EVIL
One night, during this time, as I was trying to go to sleep, which was almost impossible, I recognized that I was standing on the precipice of power. I saw power as a current of energy at the foot of my bed. At that moment I thought, “If I don’t stand in the current I’m going to miss the lesson.” I was scared to death to do it because I already was a raging, defenseless mess.
But when I stepped into it, I experienced a purity and strength I had never felt before. There was absolutely no emotion attached to this energy. I was invincible, and it was totally amazing. The best part? I had zero guilt, and knew that if I chose to stay in this energy the whole concept of having a conscience would disappear in a matter of minutes.
I stood in that current a bit longer and felt like waving my fist and shouting, “MUAAAH, the POWER!!” I knew then how it felt to be a cold and violent leader. I really did feel like some omnipresent God, in charge of everything. Because I was in rage when I stepped into that current, the energy turned to unfiltered Evil. Evil, I now believe, is a force in the universe of total purity, and it is not an accident. I don’t know why it was created, but it is there, and if we haven’t healed enough, we may go right there and stay there.
In that moment I understood how so many of the psychopathic leaders we have today must feel---nothing. Feeling nothing with all that power is a relief, the detachment is liberating. It was just like all those vampire movies and TV shows I inhale: I was the top of the food-chain, bloodthirsty, guilt free and drunk with power.
If you came from generations of unfeeling forefathers, or generations of pain and trauma never healed, you might choose The Current of Evil forever. I learned more in that 5 minutes than I could have imagined. But I made a decision right then, and that was that I would not return to that level of power until the love in my heart was stronger, and the unconscious rage had been healed. I stepped out of the vampire current, forever changed, knowing the journey ahead would be long, unpredictable, and possibly painful.
I did not trust myself for a long time and all but stopped my healing work. Over time I did discover the origin of the rage. The trauma took time and patience to reveal itself. The clearing of that trauma allowed the anger to be directed correctly, and then healing could take place. And then, guess what? I trusted myself again to come into my power!
We are afraid of our power because it is very, very strong. I truly believe, if our hearts are not as developed, if we are not grounded, if we are not smart enough, if we are not clear enough, we will use it unwisely. So if you are impatient with yourself, be patient instead and trust in your process.
BEING IN YOUR POWER IS VULNERABLE IF YOU ARE DOING IT RIGHT
What about some of the other reasons to be scared of your power? Being in your power, and being a real leader is not easy these days, maybe it never was. When you amass personal power you often become the target of those who think what you are doing is wrong. Leaders, with all of their power, become the most projected on human beings alive.
The “people” can be cruel. To rise in power, you must develop a thick skin, whether you are Mother Theresa or George Bush. There is an expectation to be perfect, and that is a subjective request. I can see how the Current of Evil would be appealing if you have big dreams, or if big things are expected of you. Feeling too much is a liability when you have to be strong through other’s hate and/or adoration.
But that is the risk that humanity needs to take. I believe that not only do you need thick skin, but you need a jumbo-sized heart, because ultimately loving yourself will help you get through criticism, and love for others will help you hear the underlying messages in their complaints, and not reject those that may reject you.
Being in a leadership position and putting yourself out there requires that you be able to love yourself no matter what because people will attack you and they wont all like you. Strangers will talk about you like they know you and like you don’t have feelings. You have to be ready for this. Getting to the place where you can be in your power and in your heart, not separating out to stay on top or safe, but remaining grounded and in touch with the rest of the people is a skill very few leaders have.
That will be the main topic of Part Two of the Power Series: How to use the power current correctly for heart-based leadership.
LIVING YOUR LIFE PURPOSE AND THE LINE OF INTENTION
By CC Treadway
What kind of a person are you? Are you an idea person? Do you dream but not do? Or are you able to carry your visions forward and plant them deeply into the ground so they may grow into a tall tree, oxygenating the world around you? There are many factors as to why someone might not be able to carry out their vision in life including natal chart, childhood environment, trauma, lack of education, culture and more. But the good news is all of us are born with the tools to bring our great gifts to the world, some of us just haven’t found them yet.
If you are unable to carry out your amazing visions, if you feel unsupported in the world, or stuck in a dead end job, or worse, if you find that every time you venture out to live your dream it is somehow sabotaged then read on.
There are a million reasons why all of things might be happening, but they all can be overcome with the development of the line of intention. In my training, at the Barbara Brennan School of Healing (BBSH), it was called the Hara Line. But I tend to call it the line of intention in my practice. We developed this line all four years of school, and the fourth year was dedicated to mastering it.
THE LINE OF INTENTION
If you are unsure what a line of intention is, let me explain. Have you ever watched an Olympic gymnast on the balance beam not make a wobble? Line of intention. Have you witnessed a great martial artist kick butt with total certainty? Line of intention. Human mastery lies in the direct experience of this line. The line of intention is the key to bringing your desires into physical world, the key to overcoming addiction, self-sabotage, victimhood and limiting beliefs. When you strongly align with your intention, the universe lines up to make it happen.
I will explain it to you as it was explained to me at BBSH. This laser line of light, while mainly a state of being, runs “from the heavens to the earth through your body.” There are three main landing points within this line. One is about 6 inches above your head called the “ID Point.” This point holds the main purpose of your life and connects you to the spiritual worlds. The next point is between your throat and chest around the high heart area. It is called the “Soul Seat.” At this point lies your longings for this lifetime. Your dreams, your visions, your true soul desires are all anchored here. The next point lies two inches or so beneath your naval. This is called the “Tan Tien.” This point grounds you to the earth, and brings your purpose, dreams and longings into physical form.
When you are in your intention you are in a place of simply “being the intention.” In other words it is not about wishing, wanting or dreaming, but being the desire. It is a non-emotionless place, a place of unlimited energy, a place of stability, strength and self confidence.
Ever know someone who works well under pressure? They have a strong line of intention. The person who falls apart during times of stress will not have as strong of a line. You do not have to be smart, good or even highly educated to have a strong intention line, it is simply a state of being. Someone with a weak intention may see obstacles as insurmountable problems, or not be able to move past grief, while someone with strong intention knows there are solutions and works towards them.
Emotional baggage can keep us from manifesting, but setting a strong intention catalyzes the process of healing that baggage, so that we can become clear. Once clarity and alignment are reached, the force of intention is free to bring into reality that which you desire. Having a strong intention will see us through obstacles that may be in our way to achieving our dreams.
YOUR HIGHER SELF AND YOUR LIFE PURPOSE
As I mentioned, just above the head lies your main life purpose and your connection to spirit. This is also where the seat of consciousness of the Higher Self lies. Now, your Higher Self knows your life purpose intimately. Connecting with your Higher Self reunites you with your reason for being here. It begins to remove the illusion that separates you from Source. Channeling your Higher Self allows you to have access to far greater knowledge of not only your life plan, but the cosmic plan. To paraphrase Dolores Cannon: “The Higher Self/Oversoul knows everything. It knows why you are here, it knows about all your lifetimes, and it is connected to Source, allowing it the information to know the divine plan.”
Direct access to the life purpose is made with the connection to the Higher Self. The life purpose can be specific or it can be general. It can have an overriding theme of “service” or “the arts” or “finance”, and then all sorts of specifics underneath that, and then another layer of specifics under that that may or may not be played out.
There are many paths within a life purpose. Some people get stuck on “it has to be this one specific thing” the truth is, free will allows you to explore how you want to express the life purpose. It’s easy to plan how things are going to go, but rarely does everything go according to plan! Our natal charts lay out a map, but how you express and navigate your journey is up to you.
You can plan a trip to Hawaii and have all the details mapped out, but who knows how you will really feel once you get there. You could be led in many different directions. Or you may have booked your trip to Hawaii without much of a plan at all. The plan could simply be to enjoy what happens! You may have a clear agenda of learning to scuba dive so you can lead people on journeys. But the feeling of being in the water, having close contact with the animals and the depths of the sea instead inspires you to paint.
Sometimes it’s hard to understand that we are co-creating with our life plan all the time. We do have the power to re-negotiate and change things if our desires lead us to that place. What doesn’t work is doing something we hate because we think we should. If you are tapped in to your higher self and soul energy, which most spiritual people are, then doing what you hate will probably make you very sick if its not leading towards what you love.
FEELING INTO YOUR LONGINGS
Most people are afraid to fully feel their desires, dreams and longings. It makes your chest ache, you think it will never happen or you had it once and it left. It might just be too painful, or if you are like many people on the spiritual path, there is some image of eradicating desires as the superior path. But I urge you to fully feel your longings with every cell of your being.
I am always amazing at how much energy we spend trying to convince ourselves we don’t need something, or we shouldn’t need something. But engaging your emotional body in the process of living your purpose is where the yummies are at! The process of “eradicating desire” is an evolutionary path, like the Buddha achieved, not a forced practice based on a “should.” That just isn’t truthful. And if you are not truthful with yourself, nothing will move in the way you want.
There is also a lot of information in those dreams. Many times we don’t even know we are not living our truth until we take a moment to truly feel our longings with our hearts and souls. The tears flow as the sweet surrender to the desire takes over and informs us of where we would like to be.
I spent a lot of time trying to force myself to have a large healing practice, but every time I truly let myself feel into it, I was happy keeping it small. What I really wanted was time and space for myself to be creative.
Getting your emotional body on board will help with the alignment process, making it much easier for the universe to line it all up for you!
CONNECTING IT ALL TO EARTH
Grounding is important for so many reason. You could think about bringing your purpose and your longings deep into the Earth as a planting process. If you allow action in the physical realms, your dreams will grow. You need to take care of your plants, water them, put them in the right environment and wait until they are rip to eat them. Then you can make delicious recipes or just eat them fresh. So many choices!!
Many people envision their dreams going into the earth, but then forget the part where they need to get into action. It’s easy to get lost in setting your intention and feeling your longings but then never actually do anything about it! Action inspires confidence in yourself and in your body. Action gets you out there in the world making it much easier for the universe to meet you half way.
ALIGNING WITH YOUR LIFE PURPOSE MAKES YOU STRONG
When we are in alignment with our life purpose, manifesting becomes very easy. I wouldn’t even call it manifesting because that would imply a separation, it’s just being in the zone. There is way more energy pointing to the success of our life purpose than against it. That doesn’t mean there won’t be obstacles. There could be many obstacles, and it is your line of intention that carries you through the obstacles. When you hit your point of doubt, you simply take a moment to realign with your path and you will start to understand what is going on and be able to get out of it easily.
When clients get aligned with their life purpose everything begins to make sense. It’s that knowing. The feeling of alignment is strong, making it easy to get into action. When you know you are on the right path, you are more willing to make mistakes!! Making mistakes is an essential part of the school of earth, and seeing obstacles as challenges that can be overcome instead of signs that you shouldn’t move forward is a huge role of the line of intention.
Sometimes when I am channeling my Higher Self I get very clear answers, and sometimes I just get the next step that will lead me to the answer. Either way is fine, because every time I talk with my higher self, I connect with my life purpose on an energetic level. There is a feeling, or a knowing I am doing the right thing and connected.
Earth can be difficult, but if you remember why you came, and if you carry out that purpose, you will be happy. When you allow the vibration of the Life Purpose to infuse your line of intention to the core of the earth, then life starts to work out for you.
Human Beings have had their sexual life force stolen from them.
As I dive deeper and deeper into the financial state that the whole world is spinning from, the human sexual wound continues to blare at me. It is really just a small percentage of people that are not in debt, that are not impoverished. And an even smaller percentage, that don’t feel controlled by money, sex or power. If you are sexually wounded you might really feel bad about being in your power. You might feel even worse about being rich.
I invite you to sink deeply into the awareness of how sexuality and finances are connected. And I mean on that cellular level, not because you read in a book that the first chakra has to do with finances and sex.
Why is that?
I have so much to say on this subject, so I may do a few articles, but as we know, everything is created with sexual energy. Everything. How did you get here? Sex. They say that Mother Mary was a virgin. Perhaps, but isn’t that interesting that they took the physical life force out of an entire religion? And isn’t it interesting how successful the power mongers were at using that religion to impoverish and control people?
Sexual abuse, misuse of sexual energy, child prostitution, pornography, priests molesting boys, it goes on and on. I once read that the two largest industries in the US are Christian rock and pornography? Talk about a split! I have been searching for the truth for awhile. I knew I had to go very deep, and in territory I was not comfortable with.
I Went to the Big Guns
So, I started channeling. At first it all felt yummy and encouraging as usual, and then, a totally different energy came in. I shifted my field into “conversation mode” and began to listen and feel into something that I knew was a huge key. These were not my every day high -level guides! Here is what they said:
There is a stamp of evil on your currency. So when you bless the money, you must intentionally bless through this evil you do not want to give power in your blessing to those who would do you harm or do another harm. So go deep within this stamp. Within the stamp is the serpent, the cobra. The cobra can be commanded and contained. The cobra can dance. The cobra contains deadly venom. This is not the appropriate stamp for a currency to be lifted into the oneness of love. So you must go to the heart of the cobra, an astral from who holds control over humanity and bring in love to the heart of the cobra. You must love the cobra’s heart. That is the key to unlocking the puzzle that resides deep into your consciousness.
It is tricky, there is the snake phobia that tortures people who have had no bad experiences with snakes. But overcoming the fear of the snake, is bringing your light to humanity and to the sexual wound, your light to the genitals, your light to the future of how humanity deals with its power, its sexuality and its finances. The divine expression of finances is a creative force. That is what is divine. It was never meant to control, dominate or scare the hell out of anyone. Do not be deceived by the cobra’s wrath. He is just mad because he has been controlled, kept tame and used for negative purposes.
Bring your love into this heart and watch your bank account grow, watch your guilt disappear as you know you are healing the wounded ally of money itself, of power itself, of sexuality itself, all tied up into one unhappy snake. This snake is not allowed to feel itself, its freedom or its love. This snake, were he free, would not be controlling or dominating humanity but playing out its own destiny as a snake.
Humanity recreates the intensity of this image each day it remains a vicitm to the dominating forces that seek to control you. The snake is very powerful by now because of all these thought forms. But the snake, my dear, the snake needs to be seen for all of who he is, he needs the other side of his greatness to be recognized so he can be free. This darkness has controlled him, and all of you for way too long.
If you corrupt the original connecting force of life you have a corrupted people, a disconnected people, you have a people who lose their moral compass when it comes to sexuality, finances and Earth. It gets passed down generation to generation. And this is the black magic of the Nazi sorcerers. And it is all about control. We tell you this snake would rather not be controlled, because while its nature can be unpredictable if threatened, generally the snake is a harmonious part of the human/astral ecosystem, and needs to be seen as such.
At this point I wanted to know a little bit more about who I was channeling, because the vibration was so different, I was getting nauseous. It was slow, dense, and intense.
We are knowledgeable guides that come not so much in the form of upliftment, but in the form of knowledge of this particular issue, we are the guardians of this information. You see, my friend, you have the power to make a real difference here and to release us from bondage. Yes we are the snakes. All of the light you carry is attractive, and we would like to help you be more prosperous. Please look at our hearts, for they have grown small.
How would you feel if an entire species hated you? This is what has happened on this great planet. We are superior to you in many ways, but somehow we became corrupted. After millenia of assisting humanity, we were corrupted, used by the biblical set who cared not about humanity, but only cared about playing with power. And we carry the deepest first chakra vibration, the deepest connection to Mother Earth, so why not manipulate an entire species against us to serve their purpose? A big mess has been made and we all must clean it up. Keep looking at our hearts because we need this healing and you need this healing.
O.M.G. I was talking to reptilians.
Over the years I have done a lot of work on the astral planes, becoming empowered, knowing exactly what to do. But this was a new level, and I had to sink deep into trust that all was well, and that I was still empowered and not being tricked.
The information and vibration that came through shifted me so totally that I have been on a rollercoaster of deep processing ever since. I have not shared everything, and I know there will be many more channelings. I researched a bit on the snake, as I know that almost every culture has a snake legend, dance or ceremony. The one piece of information that struck me the most was this line: Snakes symbolize the umbilical cord, joining all humans to Mother Earth.
Ultimately, the information given to me is about fundamentally changing our relationship with money, and fundamentally changing our relationship with Mother Earth. In order for our kundalini energy to flow, we must start at the base. The divisions that create this allocation of “this is evil, and this is good” must all be healed with Love. To live in abundance with ease in our inevitable new world, we must heal these divides. The answer is always simple.
(c) 2010 CC Treadway, Treadway Esoteric. All rights reserved.
SPIRITUAL PAYMENT:WHY IT WORKS MANIFESTING WONDERS
by CC Treadway
I have been through such an amazing journey over the past year, as we all have, in regards to finances, manifesting and trusting in our soul’s path through uncertain times. But I have come to a place where the positive shift is consistently reflecting itself in financial abundance, so it is at that point that I’d like to share with you what I have learned about being abundant doing what you love. Not to be confused with killing yourself to be rich doing what you hate.
The first article I wrote on the subject was “Pioneering the New Earth and Money,” next “Healing the Industrial Wound,” then “The Cauldron,” all essential steps in the abundance process. I would recommend that you read them before continuing. So much personal work must go into the journey of abundance, and I faced real darkness in the last year. Darkness so dark, that I will not write about it. I can only say that each person has their own version of this darkness. It is the place we have been hiding from our whole lives without really knowing it. This place must be confronted and brought to light.
A great financial coach, Morgana Rae calls it, finding our “Money Monster.” Well, with the help of private healing sessions, I found my monster, and it was ugly. For me finding my Money Monster was as easy as sinking into that horrible feeling that would come up almost every time I thought about receiving money. It was stuck somewhere in the back of my mind. But facing it, tracing it and erasing it revealed the way to abundance. Then in comes the “Money Honey.” The Money Honey to me is the representation of the belief that you deserve to be loved unconditionally, in all ways, including financially! Please visit Morgana’s website for more information on this simple yet profound philosophy.
Sacred offerings are an integral part of a harmonious life on this planet. I’m not talking tithing, although it is certainly related, I am talking making offerings to Mother Earth. From what I can tell, all ancient cultures practice this.
If there is one thing I have learned from spending time with peoples who live close to the earth and practice the old ways, it’s that they take for granted the knowledge they have, like its obvious as to why things work. Here is a great video of the Kogi Mamos talking about spiritual payment. While I might be able to feel on one level why it works, I like to have a bit more information.
What do you mean by offering?
I mean, offering something bio-degradable that you care about to Mother Earth as a thank you for all that you have. I grew up in the Episcopalian church. We offered money to the church each Sunday. It was obvious to me why money worked. The church needed money to buy things like I needed money to buy things. This is easily understood in our culture.
But after traveling with tribes and observing their culture, I wanted to try something different. I wanted to go to a much deeper level of abundance and cash was only part of the picture. I kept hearing my tribal brothers and sisters say, “Give back to the Earth, how can you keep taking and taking?” While I was turned off by the accusatory tone, I decided to give it a try because history had taught me that major mojo was behind their wishes. I just wanted it to be real and from my heart.
What would I offer? It felt a little phony to me. After all, why should I offer something that was already made by Nature? Why give back what was already hers? Would she even care if I gave her something or not? Did I really have anything to offer? I was surprised at my resistance. I had offered tobacco many times in ceremony, but I wanted to offer what really felt right to me. So I asked Mother Earth what she wanted. She told me, “Honey.” I couldn’t tell you why, but that felt really right. I love honey and gratitude inexplicably welled up in my soul. Upon a little bit of research, I found that honey has been offered to Spirit for as long as there is recorded history. There’s a reason honey is called “Nectar of the Gods.”
Making offerings is not bribery as modern thought might suggest. It is not “giving to get something.” It is not about some voracious God/Goddess that we must appease. There is more to it.
The Abundance Circuit
What happens alchemically when you offer to the Earth?
Here is what Mama told me:
When you offer to me something in the physical that I can digest, our relationship becomes real on a physical level. I know where you are, I know then how to work with all the resources available to me so that your dreams come true. I always feel your love. But love is expansive, non-local. When you place your love into something physical, it becomes focused and easy for me to understand. You are speaking to me in my language.
As well as this connection allows us a more profound relationship on the physical level, this also works with the natural cycle of things. Giving and receiving are a cycle, one that must be continually nurtured. You ask, I give, you receive, you enjoy, I ask, you give, I receive, I enjoy, you ask, I give etc. It creates a circuit. In this way the cycle is never broken, and you are not left bereft. You are aware of the cycle and we continually dialogue and feel with each other.
The flow of abundance is a circuit. In order for it to work properly, this circuit must be hooked in to. I thought this was very interesting, because indeed, I had felt Mother Earth asking me for things, and this was a new experience. She would ask that I love myself more, she would gently tug at me to sit and offer honey, she would remind me that I never had to be without, she pushed me to relax and enjoy myself and to give myself time to be creative an expressive. These were her requests, not suggestions, not demands. I started obliging. Why not?
Offering at The Hearth
When I feel the call, I go to the hearth, which for me is in my backyard, and sit on Mother Earth facing the fire. I call in the directions and offer in gratitude a bit of honey. I place it directly in the fire pit. Opening my channel, Mother Earth and I have a conversation. It’s really great actually, to have this time. It feels very natural, and truly everyone can have it. Sometimes I pray, sometimes I spend the whole time thanking her, sometimes I ask for things, sometimes I receive information, sometimes we chat, whatever comes up that day.
I found this process deepened my trust in abundance and receiving and made me very joyful. Since I started doing this my bank acct has been full. I can be working/playing in the garden, come inside and see a $500 sale on my e-store. The more fun I have, the wealthier I am! And not just material wealth, but amazing opportunities started coming my way. I was asked to host a radio show, speak on a national tour on consciousness and more.
Growing a Conscious Business
The sacred offering as spiritual payment to Mother Earth is an essential step to coming out of separation and into Unity. You see, I am growing my conscious business, and talking to others about consciously growing their business, but I will not do it without Mother Earth’s guidance. I will not continue to destroy our home out of ignorance, laziness or deliberation. But I will also not retreat into the woods and live like my ancestors did, thousands of years ago. I have embraced technology and I enjoy living as a member of a global community. My clients and friends are from all over the world. I only hope this continued prayer, and this continued dialogue with Mother Earth informs my decisions, and helps create a vibration supportive to innovative and sustainable technology on a mass scale.
Left Brain Work: Laying the Foundation
Now, I also got many systems up and running in the left brained fashion to prepare for this new way of being. I created a new, more streamlined website, an e-store, an automated scheduler for private sessions, a Magical Manifestation tele-class, and a Channeling Certification program. I also educated myself financially by reading all sorts of books and working with a business coach, James Roche. I created a conscious business support group with colleagues I trusted. Everything was in place.
When I finally went to the hearth, it was like opening the door, and all started flowing through, landing neatly in its place. The best part? I could now receive, because my Money Monster wasn’t there to stop it. Instead, I had my Money Honey fully supporting this wild adventure of living my purpose.
Before I close I will give you a loose guideline for a happily abundant life.
Steps to Manifesting, not necessarily in this order:
1. Commit to being successful at what you love: your passion drives your success
2. Find Money Monster/Money Honey
3. Lay left brained foundation
4. Lay right brain foundation: The Cauldron
5. Hook into “The abundance circuit”
I’ll keep you posted if I find any more steps, till then may your life be on track, in love and full of abundance.
(c) 2010 CC Treadway, all rights reserved.
THE SACRED SPACE WITHIN
by CC Treadway
The cauldron is a mythical place that lives within us.
It is the feminine home where ideas are churned, where creativity bubbles in the soul. Without attention to this most sacred of places, the dreams and visions we cook up cannot be supported in the world.
The Cauldron reveals itself when we are willing to be still, when we are willing to sit in the seat of our deepest longings, when we courageously face our pain and when we surrender to our joy. The Cauldron cannot be forgotten in our pursuit of success and change, for it lovingly guides us with the power of the Mother, our greatest nurturer.
Often this liquid brew is elusive. Collectively, we experienced the expulsion of the principle, and powerlessly watched our world deteriorate. When we hear our teachers tell us the feminine is returning, we only have to look within ourselves to find this Holy Grail, the primordial water that is within us bubbles forth like a knowing fairy. We may have thought she didn't exist, but she was there all along. Silently, but patiently waiting for the time we would be ready to serve her again.
To stir the cauldron, and then not serve it to the world would be a crime. The beauty that is each of our soul's gifts is a succulent cup meant for other's to drink of and taste. But there is no pressure in our inner concoction, only the pleasure of feeling the gift of the Goddess as our source of inspiration.
As I grow to new heights in my work and in life, returning to the Cauldron for a drink is what keeps me sane, it is my form of meditation, is restores me to my essential self so I can keep going, keep giving, keep striving.
My partner and I began our spring planting on the equinox. What better way to be immersed in the vast well of abundance our Mother has to offer. What a joy it was to witness that the leftover foods I had received through the winter had transformed into soil through composting, to assist in growing more food. In those moments I feel in complete harmony with the gifts offered from the Cauldron. I am consciously co-creating with the ecosystem, an integral part, shamelessly full of gratitude. How could I not marvel at what is already available to us, without an ounce of modern technology?
Keeping this connection to the Cauldron allows me guilt free growth, because as I keep our beautiful home, Earth, close to my heart, I cannot betray her. I can only be informed, day by day, the most harmonious choices to my full expression of self, love, friendship and business.
May you drink from your Cauldron each day so that you are forever filled.
Copyright 2010 CC Treadway. All rights reserved.